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Ask Doctor G
Hundreds
of visitors to this site ask Doctor G questions about every aspect of
human sexuality. As a trained sex educator he is uniquely qualified to
provide meaningful answers. But he can't answer them all! Each
month Doctor G will publish five questions
on this website and send the answers out
to subscribers to his
G-Zone ezine.
Posted below are questions frequently asked Dr. Schubach.
Please take a moment to see if your question has been asked previously.
(You may use our search
feature and/or use "Control-F or Edit/Find on Page" to search
this page, or simply scroll down and browse the questions and answers,
by topic.) If your question does NOT appear
here, you can use the form at the bottom of the page to
ask your question or make a comment. If your question or comment is posted,
you will win Doctor G's gift of the month.
G-Zone
Frequently Asked Questions
Female
Sexual Issues Female
Ejaculation & G-Spot Questions |
Orgasm
Through Intercourse
Q: My wife and I have been married for over 20 years now. For the
better part of that 20 years we had a limited but fairly good sex life.
She was able to experience multiple orgasm with penile penetration on
a somewhat regular basis. The problem is that my wife no longer is able
to climax with me alone, only with use of vibrators and/or oral stimulation.
We have become so frustrated that she now refuses to use toys, in part
due to my discomfort...do you have any suggestions other than divorcing
and moving on?
A:
There are an infinite number of factors involved in a woman being able
to reach orgasm as well as the creation of sexual desire. Just as important
as the physical component are the emotional and intellectual ones. Intercourse
is generally the most difficult way for a woman to achieve orgasm. Additionally,
the stress and tension of the difficulties between the two of you may
be contributing to the issue. Also, the pressure of her "trying" to achieve
orgasm through intercourse is counterproductive.
What I would suggest is that you work with a good sex therapist to attempt to resolve the issues between you. Simultaneously, I would suggest taking the focus off of her reaching orgasm through intercourse and put the emphasis on achieving higher states of arousal and intimacy. If you do this, the other may simply resolve itself.
Also, I would recommend that you purchase one or more of the videotapes that we sell on how to create extraordinary sex. Specifically, I would recommend The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy, and/or Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy. - Doctor G
Sexual
Desire
Q: My wife, whom I love very much, has always been extremely lacking
on the sexual desire side. For all 22 years of our married life, I have
to say that most of our arguments were over her lack of desire for me
sexually. It always takes a long time to regain her trust and affection
back after such discussions so I have learned to keep them as under control
as possible. Sometimes though, 10-14 day lapses in sexual activity drive
me crazy. When we have sex, I can count on my right hand the number of
times that I have not been able to bring her to a real orgasm. Sometimes
that involves 30 to 45 minutes of oral stimulation or an equivalent time
of penetration while she self stimulates. She has never had an orgasm
without manual stimulation and that has never bothered me. Romantic evenings
away from the kids, dinners waiting for her when she arrives home from
work, having the housework done by myself or a cleaning lady, even our
new house, all the things that hinders others, are all done for her and
yet 5-6 days are too soon for her and 12-14 days doesn't mean that there
will be sex between us. I've had her on vitamins for most of our married
life and she trusts me to give her what she needs. However, none of these
products have changed any part of her sexual desire or increased the intensity
of her sexual response during intercourse. I would love to think that
your products, combination of products, or administration of products
would help change this pattern. All I know is that her two favorite periods
are at gestation and the night before her period begins. And God help
me if something prevents us from having those times from being perfect
in every way or I lose my chance.
A:
There are an infinite number of factors involved in the creation of sexual
desire. Just as important as the physical component are the emotional
and intellectual ones. People's perceived self worth, self judgments,
sexual upbringing including information from family and peers all contribute
to our sexual identity and the circumstances under which we get turned
on. Also, people just have different desire levels and it is important
that, in a relationship, neither party blame or make their partner wrong
just for the fact that they have different desire levels. Arguments were
over who is responsible for lack of sexual desire will be totally counterproductive.
There is a very good book on this subject that I would recommend that you and your wife read. It is "Passionate Marriage" by Dr. David Schnarch and can be found at most major bookstores. After reading it, you and your wife might want to consider consulting a qualified sex therapist or sexologist to explore these issues.
Also, I would recommend that you purchase one or more of the videotapes that we sell on how to create more closeness and intimacy and enhance your sexual relationship. Specifically, I would recommend The Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques, The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy and Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy. - Doctor G
Q:
Hi, I'm a 25 yr old woman who has been on the pill for the past 9 years.
I have no sexual interest or desire for anyone, including my boyfriend.
There really are no problems in our relationship...except for the fact
that I have no interest in having sex. It's just not something I ever
think about, nothing from romance to porn makes me want to have sex. This
has been going on for years. My doctor has given me Wellbutrin hoping
that the sexual side effects would help, that was months ago and still
nothing. Is there anything you can suggest?
A: Thank you for your excellent question. I can really empathize
with what you're saying but unless you actually have low testosterone,
which can be tested for, Intrinsa is not the answer. There are a number
of other areas where scientists are working with various neurotransmitters
to see if chemistry can impact low female sexual desire. Personally, I
still believe that, just like people born with physicial disabilities,
it is possible to expand your potential and make better use of what we
have. For you I would specifically suggest that you read Dr. Patricia
Taylor's book, Expanded Orgasm
or view the video, Expand Her Orgasm
Tonight! Also, you and your boyfriend might want to consider
having Dr. Taylor and I do an Introductory
Evaluation. The cost is only $399 and well worth every penny.
- Doctor G
Sex and
Relaxation
Q:I
am wondering if sexual intercourse relieves stress in males and females?
As a male I always feel warm and positive after a good sex session with
my wife. She does not share my view on the subject, but I remember reading
something in the past that women tend to have a glow about them if they
have sex on a regular basis (I think it was two to three times a week.)
What are your thoughts on this matter? Thank you kindly
A:Thank
you for your very interesting question. It is my experience that often
men and women respond to sexual intercourse and the physicality of sex
in very different ways. Through the challenges of life and other stresses,
we can become very contracted in our day to day experience. Sexuality
can be a wonderful way to relax, release and feel our true nature once
again. For a man, the chemical and neurological effects of an ejaculatory
orgasm from intercourse can be very pleasurable and relaxing, not dissimilar
to the feeling from eating chocolate. Men tend to have shorter sexual
response cycles and can reach orgasm and those feelings much faster than
most women. For women to experience the healing and relaxing that great
sex can bring, they must find a way to move beyond the limiting programming
that society has imposed on our sexuality. So that rather than a duty
or another "thing to do" after a long day, sexuality can be
a wonderful playground to relax, have fun and let go in loving intimacy.
Women not only generally require more physical stimulation but also require
more emotional satisfaction before they can have that regular glow about
them.
These are principles that we teach (B.L.I.S.S.) in working with people to develop a sexual relationship that is an expression of their love and caring for another human being. We also offer video tapes that deal with these issues. Specifically, I would recommend The Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques, The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy and Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy. - Doctor G
Vibrators
and Orgasm
Q: My wife can't climax without a vibrator and she wants to know
what she can do to have a climax without a vibrator. Will this Crystal
Wand help or does she need some other kind of help? I want to
order your Vigorex Femme, will this help or what do we need to do to help
her have a climax without a vibrator? Love to hear from you on this.
A:
This is a question that we see more and more as women have given themselves
permission to explore sex toys. It is absolutely a woman's right to use
a vibrator if she wishes. However, like with all choices in life, there
is often a consequence. What frequently happens is that the woman's clitoris
becomes desensitized from the high vibratory rate of a vibrator. No human
action can possibly match the intensity of stimulation that the vibrator
gives. At B.L.I.S.S., we teach a woman
to resensitize her clitoris and entire vaginal area by learning the pleasures
of a more subtle stimulation. This can and may include such things as
her working with a special hose attachment
in the bathtub which puts out a gentle but steady stream of water so that
she can become used to the subtler pressure and learn which spots in her
genitalia feel most pleasurable to the gentler pressure. Also, we teach
breathing techniques to help her reach and even sustain orgasm for a longer
period of time.
The Crystal Wand is an inanimate object made of acrylic plastic. It is good for reaching the G-Spot, particularly during self-pleasuring but again cannot keep up with the mechanical power of a vibrator. The Wand would be an excellent training tool for G-Spot stimulation after the vagina has been resensitized.
As for Vigorex Femme, it certainly would help in increasing sensation to her genitals but it is not the answer by itself. The bottom line is that people must realize that no human touch can approach the intensity of the vibrator and choices may need to be made as to frequency of use of a vibrator and whether it is important enough to develop a more personal human contact way to orgasm. - Doctor G
Honeymoon
Infections
Q: Hi, I am a female who ejaculates, and I have been so happy reading
your research project. It leaves me with one question however: When I
have had a series of orgasms gushing close to a liter, I will still have
to go to the toilet and urinate (quite a lot) afterwards. How does that
fit into your findings? After perfect sex, I often get problems with my
bladder, I have to pee a hundred times a day, get honeymoon infections
and more. I am so happy to read about the pushing out effect as I have
just recently realized the connection myself.
A:
Since the female prostate (G-Spot) completely surrounds your urethra,
it is absolutely natural that you would have the urge to urinate even
after massive ejaculation. The honeymoon infections are another matter
that I am concerned about. Normally, ejaculation, particularly voluminous
ejaculation, has the effect of flushing the urethra. While there have
been some theories that there can be an emotional source to "honeymoon
infections," most often they are caused by bacteria being forced
back up into the urethra through pounding intercourse or, perhaps even,
from vigorous manual stimulation. I would suggest that you see a qualified
urologist on this matter and make sure that, either with manual or penis
stimulation, that good hygiene is observed so as to lower the possibility
of unfriendly bacteria going back up into the urethra. - Doctor G
"Giving"
Her An Orgasm
Q: I am wondering how to give my girlfriend a great orgasm. What
do you recommend?
A:
My first comment is that men do not "give" women orgasms. Only women
can be responsible for their orgasms. What a man can do is to be a skilled
and sensitive lover and create an environment in which the woman feels
safe to experience her sensuality and sexuality without expectations.
Trying to create orgasm only causes additional stress, which is counterproductive.
My view is that, in most cases, so-called sexual "problems" are a result of learning deficits. In other words, given what most people are taught about sexuality in school, by their families and peers, their anxieties and difficulties are absolutely reasonable and understandable. With an open mind and an open heart it is possible to create a sexual relationship that is truly a reflection of your love and caring for each other.
What I would recommend is that you purchase one or more of the videotapes that we sell on how to create extraordinary sex. Specifically, I would recommend The Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques, The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy or Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy. - Doctor G
What is
Tantra?
Q: Exactly
what is tantra and how can my partner and I use it to improve our relationship,
particularly our sex life? Is it a religion or something that we have
to join to get benefits?
A:
Tantra is both a science and an art that originates from ancient spiritual
knowledge in East India, Tibet, Egypt, and China through the teachings
in Buddhism, Hinduism and Taoism. Traditionally, rather than referring
to a sexual practice, Tantra was about enjoying and feeling God's presence
in every moment and becoming enlightened in the process. Tantra offers
techniques to enhance arousal and one's love making skills, as well as
one's entire life, through conscious awareness and a deeper understanding
and mastery of our life force/libido.
In American culture, we tend to want all things to be here and now - fast. People want to take the sexual information and material out of context and apply it like a magic lotion to transform their love making. However, Tantra is about a lot more than just sexual tricks or techniques. It is about the honoring of the male and female in ourselves as well in as in our partners. Tantra literally means weaving together the male and female forces. Through Tantra, we bring harmony and balance to all aspects of the human psyche, mind and body. It is about a deep and nourishing spiritual and emotional connection with God as we know him or her and with our partner, with the love act being the ultimate meditation.
Primarily, Tantra is a path of the heart and the path of pleasure. It is about loving the self enough to create a life of deep enjoyment by consciously intending and choosing actions and activities that bring the greatest pleasure and nurturance to the soul. Sexually, Tantra teaches fine and sophisticated arts of giving and receiving optimum pleasure for the self and partner -- thereby achieving transcendence, or union with the divine, through sexual pleasure and extended orgasm.
Tantra teaches that through an in-depth awareness and loving all aspects of the self, and also through honoring and adoring your partner as the embodiment of God/Goddess, one can find and allow the power of that pure love light to shine forth from within to brighten and bring more joy to the world.
There is a lot that Westerners can learn from Tantra. A more peaceful way of being, harmony with the earth and others, and connection with your beloved and the Devine, are just the beginning. For more information about Tantra and classes where you can learn about the tantric practice, please go to: http://www.doctorg.com/workshops_seminars.htm
Eating
a Flower
Recently, I have received several questions concerning oral sex and
vaginal tastes and odors.
Q:
Will it kill me or make me sick to eat a girl out? Everyone seems to do
it and my girlfriend wants me to but I am too scared. I heard it tastes
bad and smells awful.
Q:
What does a girl's vagina taste like and is it safe?
Q:
What percentage of women reject cunnilingus unless their vagina is
clean and showered first before activity? How many women would see unclean
as a turn-on?
Q:
My girlfriend and I enjoy giving oral sex to each other. But sometimes
I just simply can't stand the taste of her juices. I go down as long as
I can but sometimes I just can't because it tastes so bad. I was just
wondering if there is any product or diet supplement or a change in her
diet that would help this problem?"
Q:
According to any medical literature I have seen, a healthy woman who
practices normal feminine hygiene should not have an abnormal vaginal
odour. However, this runs contrary to my personal experience and fails
to explain the considerable variety of vaginal scents I have noticed.
Some women I have dated have exhibited very strong or (to me) unpleasant
vaginal tastes and scents regardless of their state of cleanliness while
others have had almost no identifiable taste or odour again almost regardless
of their state of hygiene at the time I took my sample. Further, in no
case could I find a correlation with diet or any other obvious factor.
Do you have any comments on this matter? I assume it would interest most
of your male (and female) readers.
A: Given our common cultural heritage of sex negativity and taboos on oral sex, questions such as this are quite reasonable. I grew up in an upper middle class Jewish family where there were subtle proscriptions against oral sex as being "unkosher." During my first attempt at giving oral sex, I almost threw up and it took years until my attitude completely shifted to make this act one of the most desirable parts of my sexuality.
One way that I made this shift was to begin to visualize the vulva as a beautiful, tasty and desirable flower. In fact, I will often use the word flower or the Sanskrit word, yoni, which means flower. That enables me to come to this act of pleasure with a certain respect and, even, reverence.
In order to make a change in one's attitude towards oral sex and vaginal tastes and odors, I think that it is important to not visualize oral sex as "foreplay" or something that is done strictly to arouse a woman and make her want to have intercourse. What has worked for me is to see it as a separate and complete act, one in which I receive as much pleasure in giving as my partner does in receiving. I take my time and really enjoy all of the recesses and folds and nuances of the vulva. If that leads to intercourse, that is fine but I try to never do it with that as a goal.
Like foods,
appreciation of vaginal tastes and odors can be an acquired taste. Science
has proven that people do have different responses to tastes and odors
and it is important for me to realize that my perception of taste and
odor is my own and I can have some control over it. It has also been shown
that diet and overall health can have some long-term effect on how we
taste and smell but ultimately these are still subjective judgments. My
attitudes towards oral sex and vaginal tastes and odors can make a big
difference. - Doctor G
|
Female
Sexual Issues Female
Ejaculation & G-Spot Questions |
FEMALE EJACULATION & G-Spot QUESTIONS
Female
Ejaculation Video
Q: Do you have any photographs or videotapes, which show Female
Ejaculation?
A: We do feature three educational videos, which discuss this phenomenon
and show it explicitly. They are: The
Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy, Ancient
Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy, and The
Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation. - Doctor G
Composition
of Female Ejaculate
Q: Has there been chemical analysis of female ejaculate and do
you know where I can have access to the results?
A: In my doctoral research project,
we analyzed the ejaculate for the two primary components of urine, urea
and creatinine, versus base line urine samples that we had taken from
the women prior to sensual arousal. What we discovered was that on average
the ejaculate contained only 25% of the amounts of these main components
of urine as the base urine specimen from the same woman.
Earlier studies also searched for evidence that the fluids originated in the urethral glands rather than solely from the bladder. My doctoral paper, Urethral Expulsions During Sensual Arousal and Bladder Catheterization in Seven Human Females, reviews those earlier studies and discusses their results.
After I published my study in September of 1996, two articles appeared claiming that they had discovered unambiguous prostatic markers in the fluid expelled during sexual arousal by several women. The first was a paper, Female Ejaculation, Myth and Reality, delivered by Dr. F. Cabello Santamaria at the XIII World Congress of Sexology in Valencia, Spain in 1997. He reported to have found the presence of Prostate Specific Antigens (PSA) levels in the fluid expelled by 75% of his test subjects. I should mention though that the test that he used to determine the PSA levels was one that is not easily duplicated, so to date I have not been able to replicate his experiment and see what results I would get.
The second paper by Dr. Milan Zaviaccic appeared in the August, 1997 issue of Acta Histochem and claims detection of protein 1 of PSA in the epithelial lining of the female urethra. Again, the test used is not easily duplicated.
These are very promising findings in the argument that at least part of the so-called female ejaculate is originating in the Skene's glands but it is by no means overwhelming enough to gain universal acceptance in the medical community. What will be necessary to change a very long-standing medical paradigm will be more studies using tests that are standardized from researcher to researcher and easily replicated.
I would also recommend your reading my article, The G-Crest and Female Ejaculation or see our video, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation, which discuss the whole question of the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra, the urethral glands and the bladder. - Doctor G
Ejaculation
as the goal?
Q: My girlfriend claims that she has been brought to orgasm several
times, but she doesn't ejaculate. What can I do to help her ejaculate?
A:It
is incredibly important to understand that ejaculation should never be
the goal, only pleasure and connection. Ejaculation will be more likely
to occur the more relaxed and aroused the women is simultaneously. This
may seem like a contradiction but it isn't. It would be helpful if you
let go of ejaculation as the goal and focused on arousal and connection
with your partner.
We offer two excellent video/DVDs, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation and Expand Her Orgasm Tonight! on this subject. Also, we have two excellent ebooks. Awakening The Sacred Gate to Supreme Bliss: G-Spot Orgasm & Female Ejaculation and Continuous Orgasm, that actually teach you how be a better lover and help create better orgasms and ejaculation for your partner. The Crystal Wand and the AquaLove are also excellent training tools to help your partner expand her experience of orgasm and ejaculation. - Doctor G
Am I
Incontinent?
Q: Is it possible that my problem with incontinence is somehow related
to the lack of desire to have sex? My husband and I are really struggling
with the loss of libido since I have had my two children. I don't have
any desire and he of course is still wanting a very active sex life.
A:
Thank you for your question. As I see it, the first thing that needs
to be addressed is the question of whether you have the medical condition
known as incontinence. If you do, you should be having an expulsion of
fluid from your urethra at times other than when you are being sexual
with a partner. There are very specific tests that a good urologist can
perform to determine whether you are actually incontinent or not. However,
assuming that you are, any kind of emotional stress, including being sexual
when you have a lack of desire to have sex, can aggravate the condition.
On the other hand, female ejaculation during sensual and sexual arousal is another matter. My research has shown that the expulsion of fluid through the urethra during sensual and sexual arousal is a perfectly natural phenomenon, to be celebrated and enjoyed. The advice that I always give women who ejaculate is to relax and enjoy it. To attempt to suppress this phenomenon not only lessens your experience of sexuality and leads to frustration and, perhaps, even to unnecessary surgery.
When asked about the composition of the fluid, I often tell people that, while it appears to have only about 25% of the primary ingredients of urine, which appear in all bodily fluids, the real issue is how to help women feel good about their bodies and all fluids that come from them.
I would also recommend your reading my article, The G-Crest and Female Ejaculation or see our video, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation, which discuss the whole question of the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra, the urethral glands and the bladder.
Surgically
Removing the G-Spot
Q:
I found your website while trying to research Skene's glands to find out
their purpose as mine are abscessed. I currently have urethral pain when
I walk and a pinch when I sit. My doctor, mentioned removing these glands.
I would like to know what the consequences of this would be. There has
been no change in my symptoms since my last surgery which removed granuloma
between vaginal wall and bladder and drained puss from the Skene's glands.
I still need to wait another couple of weeks before trying intercourse
again. I have a history of chronic vaginal yeast infections. All of these
years of problems are making me sexually dysfunctional by my fear and
anxiety. Thank you for your time.
A:
Thank you for your excellent question. While I am not a medical doctor
and cannot give a surgical opinion, this is clearly a case where I would
recommend a surgical second opinion from a doctor trained in sexual medicine.
The existence of Skene's glands has been universally accepted in medical science with reports from as long ago as with Aristotle. However, most doctors, including OB/GYNs, receive woefully little training in human sexuality separate from reproductive biology. Because of misunderstanding and misinformation regarding the so-called G-spot, all but the most informed doctors make no connection between the G-spot and Skene's glands. You might want to read my article, Did Grafenberg Really Mean Spot, in which it is abundantly clear that Dr. Grafenberg was talking about the Skene's glands.
Overall, unless a cancerous condition or pre-cancerous condition is detected in a woman's Skene's glands (a very rare occurrence), I think that it would be a mistake to remove the Skene's glands (G-spot). Cases where the Skene's glands become infected are fairly common. There can be a number of sources of congestion and then infection of the Skene's glands. The most common one is simply because they are not draining properly. The holistic remedy for this is frequent massaging of the Skene's glands (G-spot) with continuation all the way through to expulsion of fluid. (A by-product of this remedy might be a whole lot of pleasure in your life.) One thing that I should warn you about if you pursue this course is that it may bring up deep seated feelings and emotions and you may need some help in working those through. - Doctor G
Q: In this issue, I am pleased to reprint a letter to Dr. John D. Perry, one of the world's leading authorities on the G-Spot, in which he shares his opinion in his answer on some of the issues that can be involved with hysterectomies and the G-Spot.
A website
visitor asked: "I recently had a radical hysterectomy and can no
longer find my G-spot. My doctor says there is no such thing but I surely
know that he is wrong. I have been searching the internet to find help
and finally I started getting somewhere today."
A:
It is not unusual for radical hysterectomy to change one's sexual sensitivity
in the vagina, especially if it was "vaginal (entrance)" surgery
and the doctor has no awareness of the G-Spot which is now [for the past
three years] medically known as the "human female prostate".
In fact, when The G Spot was first published, many doctors immediately latched onto the obvious explanation for a long-standing surgical anomaly -- does hysterectomy affect sexual response? It was quickly apparent that for women whose sexual response was limited to the clitoral (pudendal) nerve pathway -- the "only" one described by M & J and true of a modest majority of western women -- would NOT be affected. But for the sizeable minority who also (or only) used the G-Spot (pelvic) nerve pathway the effects could be devastating.
We are rapidly approaching the point where the information has been well known for a long time (25+ years) and very soon, I predict, someone is going to win a multi-million dollar damage suit against a surgeon who isn't up to date on wiring and plumbing. When that happens, we will begin to see much more rapid recognition from the medical/surgical establishment. It may first come from their malpractice insurance companies, who have the most to lose!
In fact, the first lawsuits don't even have to "win" in order to attract the attention of the insurance companies -- they are in the business of assessing risk, and this risk is obvious. Please inform me if you know of any victims of medical ignorance or interested lawyers."
[More information
on the human female prostate and Dr. Zaviacic's research can be found
on Dr. Perry's website, DrGSpot.net and DoctorG.com.]
Enjoying
Female Ejaculation
Q: I'm not sure what to do, as I can't get information from anywhere
regarding female ejaculation. I have been married for 8 years and in
that time I have possibly " sprayed" my husband about 15 times. We are
not sure what this is and we are assuming that it is an ejaculate. The
fluid has none or very little smell but leaves a large wet mark on the
bed. It only happens when I orgasm when my husband enters me from behind
if I am on my hands and knees. I am a bit confused, as this has never
happened with any other lover that I have had. I would really appreciate
any information or advice that you can give as I am becoming a bit self-conscious
about this.
A:
My research has shown that the expulsion of fluid through the urethra
during sensual and sexual arousal is a perfectly natural phenomenon, to
be celebrated and enjoyed. The advice that I always give women who ejaculate
is to relax and enjoy it. To attempt to suppress this phenomenon not
only lessens your experience of sexuality and leads to frustration and,
perhaps, even to unnecessary surgery.
When asked about the composition of the fluid, I often tell people that, while it appears to have only about 25% of the primary ingredients of urine, which appear in all bodily fluids, the real question is how women feel about their bodies and all fluids that come from them.
You might be interested to know that we now offer an excellent video, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation. The video discusses the questions of Female Ejaculation as well as the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra, the urethral glands and the bladder. - Doctor G
Partner
Response To Female Ejaculation
Q: About seven years ago I was involved in a relationship where
my partner introduced me to orgasms by stimulation of my "G" spot. They
were by far the most intense orgasms I had ever experienced and resulted
in "gushes" of fluid from my vagina. My partner at that time thought
it was great and took great pleasure in bringing me to this point. The
fluid was so great that we had to put towels on the bed. That relationship
ended a couple of years ago and for the last year I have been seeing another
man who doesn't think this expulsion of fluid is so wonderful. He is
convinced I am urinating on him and it is causing a huge problem for us.
It is really our only problem. I now can't seem to have an orgasm without
it. Is there anything I can do to stop it. I had surgery 10 years ago
to repair my bladder after several children. Do you think this needs
to be redone? I never felt it was urine however there is so much of it
I can't see how it could be anything else. It sometimes, not always,
smells like urine and that is why he is convinced it is. Any suggestions?
A:
This question is one that I see a lot in one form or another and one that
I feel quite strongly about, particularly from the prospective of a male
partner of an "ejaculator."
Regardless of any scientific evidence indicating that your expulsion of fluid is natural and involuntary, the question of your partner's reaction to this and your concern for that reaction causing a need for corrective surgery is an important and subjective relationship question. As you mentioned in your correspondence, your former partner took the same experience and rejoiced in it. I personally rejoice in a passionate, alive and "juicy" woman and would want to do nothing to cause her to have to restrain her pleasure or desecrate her body because of my issues with bodily fluids. I did not always feel this way but I recognized it as my problem and not my partner's. I became informed about what was going on and then I made a conscious decision that I was going to overcome and transform my negative experience of voluminous amounts of fluid. A teacher of mine used to say that you can't change an apple into an orange but you can change your experience of eating the apple so that it tastes like an orange. That is why we have a higher level of conceptual thought than animals.
I know that this is a real personal tragedy and it is easy for me to say to you and your partner to learn to love your bodies and everything that comes from them. However, to me that is by far the better option to surgery or to losing a good relationship over something that can be seen as positive. -
I would also recommend your reading my article, The G-Crest and Female Ejaculation or see our video/DVD, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation, which discuss the whole question of the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra, the urethral glands and the bladder. - Doctor G
Volume
of Fluid
Q: I've been a female ejaculator for 35 years and in a recent relationship
the volume of ejaculate is overwhelming. I reach an average of a dozen
orgasms and with each one the fluid increases and is expelled with such
force that I gush up to 18 inches. I'm concerned about the copious amounts
of fluids that i'm losing. I'm left weak, out of breath and obviously
dehydrated. Is this highly unusual and should I be concerned? Or just
enjoy it.?
A: While some women expel only a small amount of fluid, less than
a teaspoon, others expel copious amounts. During my doctoral research
project, one of the women expelled almost a full liter of fluid over a
two hour period AFTER we had drained her bladder. The source and composition
of those expulsions are the subject of my article entitled The
Beer Piss Theory
In any case, my advice to you is to just relax and enjoy the experience. As I often tell people, pleasure and increased connection with your partner should be the goal, not ejaculation. Do make sure you drink sufficient fluids so you don't become dehydrated. Many women drink Gatorade or a similar beverage. - Doctor G
Stimulating
the G-Spot and the Urge to Urinate
Q: Whenever I stimulate the area of the G-Spot in my wife, she tells
me that it is very uncomfortable with a high urgency to urinate. I have
asked her to try and relax but it does not help. This is only after a
very few seconds and this happens frequently. Is this natural and what
should we do about it?
A:
Since the G-Spot is actually the urethral glands, it is perfectly natural
and understandable that she should have an urge to pee. I would suggest
that she follow that urge rather than suppress it by getting up and going
to the bathroom and then resuming sensual contact.
I would also recommend your reading my article, The G-Crest and Female Ejaculation or see our video, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation, which discuss the whole question of the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra, the urethral glands and the bladder. - Doctor G
Female
Ejaculation and the G "Spot"
Q: Is there a connection between the G-Spot and Female Ejaculation?
A:
I would recommend your reading my article, The
G-Crest and Female Ejaculation. Also, we offer an excellent
video, The Amazing G-Spot & Female Ejaculation.
Both the article and the video discuss the questions of Female Ejaculation
as well as the connection between the so-called G "Spot" and the urethra,
the urethral glands and the bladder. - Doctor G
Ejaculation
as a Goal
Q: When my lover stimulates my G-Crest I usually have a very intense
orgasm. As soon as he touches that area - I have a VERY DEMANDING need
to pee. As soon as he moves away - it stops. He and I have discussed
it and we both want me to ejaculate since I seem to be on the verge of
doing so. I have VERY strong PC muscles...often too strong making entry
of the penis difficult.
Currently, when he touches the G-Crest I really try to relax the PCs and
come. I do come but without the ejaculation. I am highly orgasmic and
come many times during all phases of foreplay and intercourse.
We
both feel that I am SO CLOSE to the ejaculation part - what can we do
to make it happen for us?
A:
Ejaculation should never be the goal, only pleasure. Ejaculation will
be more likely to occur the more relaxed and aroused you are simultaneously.
This may seem like a contradiction but it isn't. It would be helpful
if you let go of the concern and just enjoyed yourself. - Doctor G
Female
Ejaculation, The G-Spot & Male Multiple Orgasm
Q: I am a 40 yr old woman and would like to have a true orgasm.
I do have one through oral stimulation of the clit at which time a rushing
feeling goes through me. My boyfriend and I have been looking for the
g-spot for some time now. In one of our last searches he told me that
the strength I have inside me is incredible. He said when I squeeze the
way I do it almost makes his fingers hurt. I like the way it feels so
much it's like I can't get enough and I want more although I don't feel
the earth shake nor do I release any fluids or have a rush consume me.
I don't know if you can help but is this normal or are we doing something
wrong? PLEASE answer I'm desperate.
A:
Each man and woman's experience of orgasm is subjective and unique. A
variety of physiological and psychological factors are involved. Due
to any combination of these factors, many women may or may not find intercourse
the easiest way to achieve G "Spot" stimulation and/or orgasm.
As for the question of locating and stimulating your G "Spot," the problem may be that the thing you are looking for is not a spot but instead a gland that completely surrounds the urethra. For more information on this subject, I would suggest that you read my article, Did Gräfenberg Really Mean Spot?
In terms of releasing fluids, it is my position that this should never be a goal, but instead pleasure should be the goal. Many women and men may ejaculate once and feel satisfied and complete while others may ejaculate multiple times. I discuss this fully in my article, The G-Crest and Female Ejaculation.
For a man, ejaculation and orgasm do not have to be the same thing. It is possible for men to be multi-orgasmic with or without ejaculation. We carry two very good audiotapes on the subjects of ejaculatory control for men and male multiple orgasm. - Doctor G
Finding
your G-Crest
Q: Where exactly is the G-Crest or G-Spot?
A:
You might want to read some of the articles that I have posted on my site
regarding the G "spot" controversy. Gräfenberg
himself made it very clear that there is no "spot." However, what is
there is a gland that completely surrounds the urethra. It most women
it is located closest to the urethral opening. Just imagine the line
of the urethra going up the middle of your groin to your bladder. You
can stimulate your G-Crest through the upper wall of the vagina, generally
close to the vaginal opening or sometimes by messaging it from the outside
at a point just above your pubic bone. You should feel and initial desire
to go to the bathroom, which should let you know you are on the right
track.
Also, the Crystal Wand that we sell is very good for finding and stimulating the G-Crest. - Doctor G
MALE G-Spot
(PROSTATE)
Recently,
I have received several questions concerning the male prostate.
Q: Do
men have a G-Spot?"
Q:
My question is.......don't men have a G-Spot? If so where on earth
would I locate it?"
Q:
This is great to know about the female G-spot, but don't men have
a G-spot, their prostate, in their anus? How do I excite this? What does
it do? How do I get my wife to want to stick her finger up there?
Q:
We are a 30 year old couple who has recently become aware of the male
prostate gland as a sexual organ. My partner has tried to stimulate my
prostate gland but cannot seem to find it. Could you give us a detailed
description of how to do this, including the position we should use and
what lubricant is best for anal entry. Can a man cum solely from such
stimulation?
Q:
Hi doc, I suffer from prostatitis, can this tool help me to treat
this thing?
A:
Yes. Men do have a G "Spot" just the same as women. It is called the prostate
gland and is responsible for creating prostatic fluid that, with sperm
from the testes, becomes the male ejaculate. Like with women, the male
prostate gland completely surrounds the urethra just slightly below the
base of the scrotum. For purposes of massage and pleasure, it can be reached
through either the upper wall of the anus or by placing pressure from
the outside at a spot at the perineum (located between the scrotum and
the anal opening). A lubricant with higher viscosity than those normally
used as vaginal lubricants is recommended.
While men in our culture have been reluctant to experience prostate massage due to negative ideas about anal activity, men who have had the courage to go beyond their negative programming often report great pleasure and expanded full body orgasms from prostate stimulation. There is also an argument, which has not yet been scientifically proven, that regular prostate massage can keep the gland supple and avoid hardening that may lead to higher incidents of prostate cancer.
While I find that there is never a substitute for human contact, many men feel more comfortable exploring their prostate glands on their own. The Crystal Wand can be an excellent tool for men to explore the pleasure that can come from prostate massage. - Doctor G
Expand
Her Orgasm Tonight!
Q: Why is it that the phenomena of female ejaculation is just becoming
known? Is there something "new" that women are doing to facilitate this?
Are women learning how to accomplish this and, thus, this is leading to
more notoriety? I have heard of this phenomena but still remain rather
skeptical; do you recommend someplace as a resource to experience this
firsthand? Are there sexologist research video archives of this that
are accessible to the public?
A:
I would strongly recommend that you read my article, The
G-Crest and Female Ejaculation. It has a substantial section on the
history of the phenomena. As for viewing female ejaculation and learning
how to facilitate a partner to mind blowing orgasms and, perhaps, ejaculation
(not to be a goal), then I would suggest that you purchase a copy of the
video/DVDs, The Amazing G-Spot & Female
Ejaculation, The Lover's
Guide to Sexual Ecstasy and The
Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy from our website. -
Doctor G
|
Female
Sexual Issues Female
Ejaculation & G-Spot Questions |
Male
Multiple Orgasm
Q: Is it true that women have better orgasms than men? If so,
is it possible to become a multi-orgasmic man and have higher intensity
orgasms?
A: I feel that it is a broad generality to say that women have
better orgasms than men. Better is a subjective word but I would say
that women generally seem more willing to discuss ways to improve and
even expand their experience of orgasm than men. If you truly wish to
become a multi-orgasmic man, I would suggest that you purchase our audiotapes,
Total Ejaculation Control
and A Guided Erotic Journey for Men.
- Doctor G
Male Ejaculatory
Control
Q:I am having problems lasting long enough to get my girlfriend fully
pleasured. Is there anything I can do to lengthen how long I can last
in bed?
Q:How
can I delay my ejaculation and prolong my orgasms, thereby being able
to pleasure my partner better?
Q:I
don't have a hard time getting an erection, but I have a hard time coming
to an orgasm during intercourse with my girlfriend. I have no problem
when I masturbate, and I held off of that for a month hoping that that
was the problem. Is there anything wrong with me or am I just not very
sensitive? If that is the case, is there anything that I can do to make
my penis more sensitive?
Q:How
can I make my husband ejaculate quicker?
Q:How
do you improve the sensitivity of your penis? Staying power has never
been a problem for me, but I do have difficulty having orgasms during
intercourse. I attribute this to a lack of penile sensitivity. Is there
anything I can do to change this?
These questions are about men and how they can control or delay ejaculation. Some saying they "come too fast" while others have trouble orgasming at all. Since some men are taking medications that retard ejaculation and there can be other physical sources to these problems, all men should make sure that they have discussed their situation with a knowledgeable physician. However, most of the time these problems are not physically based but are simply results of the lack of information and education that most of us had in forming our sexual patterns.
One thread that runs through these questions as well as others are the painful emotional and relationship consequences of not dealing with these issues. Men can learn how to control their ejaculation, while at the same time increasing sensitivity and even experience multiple orgasms, with and without ejaculation. I can testify to this because I learned how and the process is not a lot different than other disciplines that involve mind over body control. Some examples would include the ability to slow the heart rate through yoga and meditation.
The first step in transformation is recognizing that change is possible. I believe that we are evolutionary beings and have only explored a small percentage of our ultimate sexual potential. For men, just like with women, ejaculation and orgasm are not the same and it is totally possible to have one with or without the other. Obtaining ejaculatory mastery not only can help create more satisfying relationships but can also enhance and expand a man's self esteem. The kinds of exercises and techniques that are offered at DoctorG.com can train men how to obtain ejaculatory mastery. I highly recommend the exploration of these techniques.
Q: I
recently underwent a physical examination and, because I am 54 and have
not ever had a prostate exam, they insisted I should. The family doctor
examined me and, afterwards, I was going to ask what exactly she had done
but did not. Up to this point in my life, I have had a wonderful sex life.
My orgasms were powerful, multiple and I never had any problems of any
kind. Since this examination, each orgasm has become less and less and
now I have difficulty achieving an orgasm. If I am successful, it is disappointing.
I have no problem with erections, my desire is the same, my orgasms are
just not what they used to be. Everyone says it is because of my age.
Do you think it could be anything else and do you have any suggestions?
A:
The fact that your orgasms would change so much after a simple rectal
exam brings up an enormous red flag for me. I don't know if you also had
a blood test for Prostate Specific Antigens or any indication of BPH,
but I definitely would recommend your consulting a doctor with some training
in human sexuality, possibly a urologist, to rule out all physiological
possibilities for such a rapid change. Beyond that, there are an infinite
number of factors involved in the creation of our perception of orgasm.
Just as important as the physical component are the emotional and intellectual
ones. It's also possible that concern about your prostate health plus
stimulation of your prostate may have triggered an emotional reaction.
In women, such emotional reactions often occur after the first time they
have had their prostates (aka g-spots) stimulated. - DoctorG
Medication
and erections and ejaculation
Q: I was wondering what I could take to correct sexual dysfunction
due to the taking of Zoloft. What would be safe to get harder erections
that last longer?
A: Zoloft and other antidepressants have a reputation for retarding
orgasm. Vigorex Forte may or may not
be helpful in this situation but it can't hurt to try. Vigorex
products are homeopathic formulations that contain nothing injurious to
health. They have been taken by hypertensives, diabetics, men on blood
pressure medication, Methadone and Antabuse. Despite the fact that there
is no indication whatsoever that it could be harmful or injurious to anyone,
If you have a medical condition and you are under medical supervision,
you are advised to inform your physician of your desire to take this product.
If you have a known allergy to oats or lactose, you may experience your
allergic symptoms in response to taking this product. - Doctor G
Effects
of stress and medications on erections and ejaculation
Q: Although there seems to be very little information available
on the subject, I know that there are a lot of men with troubles ejaculating
or orgasiming at all. This is especially so if they are on antidepressive
or hypertensive medications.
A couple of years ago I was at a Veteran's (military) help course for
those with PTSD. During an informal late night session, all the men (26?)
stated that retarded ejaculation or orgasmic inability had been a major
problem.
The youngest to have had this problem with medication had been 24 at the
time. The problem persisted well past the supposed drug half life periods
and started consistently before any effects of the medications were supposed
to be felt. Some drugs that are written up as having no sexual side effects
were found by all the men to be to blame. This was a couples help course
and the wives stated that it wasn't just their partners imaginations.
All but one man had used Caverject injections for a period of time to counter loss of libido (primarily lack of interest) due to this problem as well as impotence side effects from other medication. Many of the men had simply stopped taking medication, although still obtaining the scripts, and simply flushed medication down the sink. More than one of the veterans had faced assault charges when "off" their medication but preferred that to the side effects. Interestingly, the doctors there that night were most surprised at what they were told about our sexual side effects. They were especially surprised that our partners confirmed what was said. Some of the partners were in another group and independently confirmed the problems.
Do you know
of any literature or assistance for this problem? I cannot go off the
medication and I will be on it for life. As I am only in my thirties,
this is a great concern. It seems that all the medications I have tried
have this effect on me. I
can give my wife a lot of pleasure when I am able to get an erection because
I have no trouble with physically keeping going. Erections can take quite
a while to attain but I think that is at least partly psychological. Orgasm
& ejaculation, however, can take two or three hours of intense masturbation.
This time period seems to occur with most medications. I do not masturbate
all the time but do get extremely frustrated and then seem to have almost
a compulsion to "come".
A:
You have proposed a very interesting but complex set of questions and
I will try to separate out the various issues. First, there is the question
of the effect of psychotropic drugs on erectile function. Then there
is the question of the effect of anxiety, whether it is from fear of not
being able to obtain and/or maintain an erection or from severe emotional
distress caused by things such as PTSD. Often, the line between the two
can become blurred and both can be contributing factors to erectile dysfunction.
From a psychological standpoint, the traditional treatment for erectile dysfunction and/or retarded ejaculation has been to attempt to lower the level of stress, trying to obtain or maintain erection and/or have an ejaculatory orgasm. This has usually been done by de-emphasizing intercourse and teaching people other non-coital methods of sexual expression so that the anxiety will be lessened and erection more likely to appear and remain. In the case of retarded ejaculation, I would like to point out that many men are just as distressed that they ejaculate too soon. Through the use of guided imagery and breathing techniques, men can be trained to have exquisite multiple orgasms without ejaculation. Also, the breathing and guided imagery techniques often cause relaxation and a lessening of anxiety.
On our website, we carry two such audiotapes, Total Ejaculation Control and A Guided Erotic Journey for Men that you might want to try. - Doctor G
Penis
Size
Q: I have a question. How can I get my penis to be longer and
bigger ? Are there some specific curative, therapy or recipe to get better?
Please Help me!!!
A:
Thank you for your question but I'm afraid that I have bad news. You
can't without seriously desecrating your body through surgery. There
is an old saying that you might consider. "It's not how long you make
it but how you make it long." Try to be the best and most considerate
and caring lover you can be and you will do fine. Sex is about a lot
more than a large or hard penis. - Doctor G
Premature
Ejaculation
Q: I am a 32 yr. old male and seem to have a problem in that I
am ejaculating quite fast and would like to know if you can recommend
either a book or some advice in order to slow down my spermicidal ejaculation
when making love to my wife.
A:
You are still quite young at 32 and this is a very common male issue.
The problem of "ejaculating quite fast" can be managed with some basic
educational understandings. We have an excellent audiotape, Total
Ejaculation Control, which can be purchased through our website.
- Doctor G
More
than a Stiff Penis
Q: I have taken your Vigorex product for several months and there
is an increased urge to have sex. My testicles have a sense of fullness
and I have a strong urge to have sex. The issue is that I don't seem
to be able to keep an erection very long and I am searching for the feeling
of a throbbing penis. My gal is not especially sexual and there is no
foreplay. That can decrease the time for an erection to blossom. Sexual
Trivia says a man under 40 can achieve an erection is 10 seconds. I remember
I didn't need foreplay 6-7 years back. I am 52 now. It takes much more
effort now. Is there a chemical the body produces from the brain that
stimulates the penis to enlarge? By the way, what is your experience
with the penis enlargers? These are the ones that are suction devices
which are said to expand the blood engorged tissues of the penis, much
like muscle building? Are they effective and building the blood capacity
in one's penis. Their advertisement says they can enlarge the penis by
2"-4". Comments?
Anyway,
the bottom line is that I like sex and want to have it a lot. Your pills
do the trick of increasing desire and my gonads can attest to the sensation.
My cholesterol is 145, my heart rate is under seventy, my testosterone
is within normal. I need my penis to reach full capacity.
A:
Since you are asking for my opinion, the first thing that I must say is
that sex is about a lot more than a stiff erection and intercourse. Personally,
I dislike the term "foreplay." The sexual acts that we label as "foreplay"
create an assumption that intercourse is the goal. In addition to the
natural physiological process that takes place with aging, anxiety caused
by worrying about losing an erection will also effect its duration. I
would suggest that you just be in the moment and enjoy every sensation
of whatever sexual activity that you are involved in.
Everyone has a right to pursue sexuality in any way that they wish but I must tell you from my considerable experience that you and your partner are missing a lot by bypassing the range of pleasurable sexual activities and going straight to intercourse. There are an infinite number of factors involved in the creation of sexual desire. Just as important as the physical component are the emotional and intellectual ones. Perhaps your partner would feel more sexual if you were spending more time just touching and caressing and building the passion.
As for the question of the so-called penis enlargers, my opinion is that they are a total waste of time and money. You have stated that you have no trouble getting an erection but the problem is in maintaining it and your desire to feel a "throbbing penis." Physiologically, we have learned that nitric oxide is the key ingredient in preventing the reversal of blood flow and loss of erection. A cock ring will serve the same purpose in preventing blood flow reversal. Chemically, Viagra works towards that same principal as does a product that we carry called ProSexual Plus.
Another suggestion that I would have for you is that you consider purchasing a videotape and audiotape that we sell on our website. I strongly believe that the video The Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques would really be helpful for you and your partner. I would also suggest the audiotape A Guided Erotic Journey for Men which will teach you how to have multiple orgasms with or without a stiff penis. - Doctor G
Dealing
With Condom Anxiety
Q: I need your help. I have a question, and I pray you could answer
it. Every time I put on a condom before sex I lose my erection. This always
happens and I need to know how to stop this problem. I am 20 years old
so I can't figure out what is wrong with me? I have been to a urologist
and he gave me some viagra samples. All that stuff did was make me real
hot and give me a hugh headache. I get erections without a condom but
they usually don't last that long. This is a big problem because sometimes
I have unprotected sex with my girlfriend. I don't want her to get pregnant!
I have also tried Viromax and that has not worked either. What do I do
...please help.
A:
Congratulations on being aware of the importance of safer sex practices.
You are already halfway home to the solution I have a number of suggestions
for you. First, it would be helpful if you could reduce your anxiety about
the issue because fear only adds to the problem. I know that that is easier
to say than to do but you need to start a position of not making yourself
wrong. It is possible to make the whole process of putting on the condom
more sensual and erotic. By adding play to the activity, you can also
help alleviate the anxiety.
It is also important not to make intercourse the goal. I even suggest to people that the lack or loss of an erection means that you are not yet ready for intercourse. If you lose your erection, just view it as an excuse to have fun by beginning again and engaging in other sexual activities until you are so aroused that putting on the condom sensually becomes inconsequential.
On a more practical note, I would suggest using Durex Avanti condoms. They are made out of polyurethane rather than latex and are much more sensitive and natural feeling. Also, I would think that Viagra could be useful. However, headaches were frequently reported in the Viagra clinical trials and I would recommend taking an analgesic such as aspirin or tylenol simultaneously with the Viagra. - Doctor G
Young
and inexperienced
Q: Hi, I am 18 yrs old, and I am having a problem. Before my girlfriend
and I have sex, I have no problem getting erect. However, when it comes
to actual sex, I do not get erect or aroused. I want to have sex with
her and nervousness doesn't seem to be the problem. What should I do?
A:
My view is that, in most cases, so-called sexual "problems" are a result
of learning deficits. In other words, given what most people are taught
about sexuality in school, by their families and peers, their anxieties
and difficulties are absolutely reasonable an understandable. On top
of that, you are both very young but with an open mind and an open heart
it is possible to create a sexual relationship that is truly a reflection
of your love and caring for each other.
What I would recommend is that you purchase one or more of the video/DVDs that we sell on how to create extraordinary sex. Specifically, I would recommend The Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques, The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy, or Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy. - Doctor G
Strengthen
Ejaculate
Q: My question to you is about male ejaculation. Is there anything
I can take orally to enhance my ejaculation? I am not looking to increase
the sperm count necessarily but want to increase the volume of semen when
I do ejaculate. My girlfriend enjoys it when we hold off for a couple
of days and the quantity seems to rise by itself, but would like to experience
large quantities of semen when I reach orgasm more frequently. Any advice
would be greatly appreciated. I have heard that bee's pollen would do
the trick but not really sure if this is true are just a wives tale.
A:
I know of no proven treatment that will increase your ejaculate. Your
ejaculate is a combination of semen from the testicles and prostatic fluid
and both tend to put out less fluid as you get older. As you pointed
out, not ejaculating for several days will increase the volume. This delay
combined with Tantric sexual practices can greatly increase your pleasure
and you can even learn to have multiple orgasms without ejaculation.
You might want to consider buying our videotape, Ancient Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy, or our audiotapes, Total Ejaculation Control and A Guided Journey for Men, which is about male multiple orgasm. - Doctor G
Surrogate
Partner
Q: I am a virgin and I think I need the help of a surrogate partner.
Can you help me?
A:
Being a virgin or not yet having experienced the miracle of partnered
sex is one of the areas most responsive to work with a surrogate partner
and supervising therapist. I suggest that you check with the International
Professional Surrogates Association (IPSA) and see if they know
of any qualified sex therapists or surrogate partners anywhere in your
area. - Doctor G
Female
Sexual Issues Female
Ejaculation & G-Spot Questions |
Safety
of Non-Water-Soluble Lubricants in the Vagina
Q:
My husband and I like to use either almond oil or mineral oil as a lubricant.
While I know that neither oil is recommended with condoms, we don't use
condoms and were wondering if these oils can cause vaginal infections?
A:
There is considerable controversy over the safety of nonwater-soluble
lubricants such as vegetable oil or mineral oil as a vaginal lubricant.
For some time, it has been the conventional wisdom that the use of nonwater-soluble
lubricants during sexual activity could lead to yeast and other bacterial
vaginal infections. Doctors are taught this in medical school and many
noted reference books on sexuality repeat this claim.
The basic argument is that nonwater-soluble lubricants will not easily wash out of the vagina or be absorbed. This can lead to alkalization of the vagina and an imbalance in the pH, which creates conditions for possible bacterial infections.
I addressed this issue in my article, The Safety of Nonwater-Soluble Lubricants in the Vagina. I tried to be fair and open minded with these questions. All women are different and have to make their own choices regarding their bodies and what they put in them. Just because something is considered a "known" fact does not by itself make it true for all people. My position as a responsible sex educator is to give a warning that nonwater-soluble lubricants may possibly, in some women and at some times, create an environment for vaginal infections. For anyone to say for certain that nonwater-soluble lubricants are either totally safe or unsafe is an irresponsible position and one that does not serve the cause of women's health. - Doctor G
50ml
vs. 250ml bottle of Liquid Silk
Q: Is there any difference between the 50ml and 250ml bottles of
Liquid Silk?
A:
The 250ml pump bottle of Liquid Silk
is a much better bargain at $14.95 plus $5.95 S/H than the 50ml bottles
at $5.95 plus $5.95 S/H. Personally, I use one of the 50ml bottles for
travel and refill it from the pump bottle. However, 4oz empty plastic
travel bottles are easily available at most drug stores. - Doctor G
International
Wire Transfers
Q: Is it possible to pay for any purchases by wire transfer?
A:
It is possible for you to pay by wire transfer. We will need to know
exactly what you would like to order. Then, we will let you know how
much your order with shipping and handling charges will be. Then, a wire
transfer would be necessary with a $10 additional fee for bank charges
that will be incurred because of the wire transfer.
Packaging
Q: How are your products packaged? Is there any chance that someone
will be able to realize what I have order? This could be very embarrassing
to me.
A:
Our products are packaged very discretely.
Adult
Films
Q:My wife has never really been into "porno" movies.
But she is no "prude" either (former nude dancer) and nudity
does not bother her at all. I have my own collection of the "typical
made for a male" movies, that I watch on occasion and she wanders
in and out of the room but doesn't really pay attention for more than
a few minutes at a time. This reaction has really caused me not to watch
very many hard core movies, and mostly we just watch each other <grins>.
Now yesterday I asked her if she wanted to watch a porno, and she said
if you have one with a decent plot. I dug into my collection and found
1001 Erotic Nights. From my memory this was a pretty good movie. We put
it in, and wow. She watched the entire thing, and actually complemented
the movie saying "It was the best porno she had seen, and wished
there were more like it" So here I am looking for more like it. I
have awoken a sleeping dragon. She wants me to buy more. Anyway, my question
is one of advise. I found your site today, and looked at the listing you
have, but can you answer a question for me. My wife enjoys seeing the
hard core action as long as the story is good, the acting is not real
stupid, and the music is cool. What movies should I purchase? Can you
give me a clue as to a few movies that should be at the top of my list?
Like maybe a top 5? Looks like we are going to have an interesting movie
night lined up each week.
A: Classic Adult Films
- are my recommendations for the best adult films for serious adult movie
connoisseurs. You can purchase most of those films through that page.
Also, we offer over 150 top adult films and DVDs through our adult store.
Also, I would recommend that you purchase one or more of the videotapes
that we sell on how to create more closeness and intimacy and enhance
your sexual relationship. Specifically, I would recommend The
Lover's Guide: Advanced Sexual Techniques,
The Lover's Guide to Sexual Ecstasy, or Ancient
Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy.
Need
Help with Ordering
Q: I am having trouble ordering your products over the Internet.
Can I call you for assistance or place my order by phone, facsimile or
by mail?
A:
If you are having trouble ordering online, you can call us at (415) 459-2801
(Tuesday afternoons and Wednesday through Friday mornings (PST) or fax
or mail us a copy of the order form that appears at http://www.doctorg.com/orderform.htm.
Ordering
Via Fax
Q: Is it possible for me to order your products without entering
my credit card over the Internet?
A:
It is possible to place an order through our secure online shopping cart
and send us your credit card number via fax to 415/883-2989. Just follow
the instructions on the shopping cart and indicate at the appropriate
time that you wish to pay by credit card via fax. A copy of your order
can be printed out and faxed to us with your credit card number and your
signature completed. Another way that you can order by fax and bypass
the shopping cart is to print out the fax/mail order form at http://www.doctorg.com/orderform.htm.
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